Three powerful questions to detect lies: What’s going on, guys? Welcome to the Behavioral Arts. In this short video, I’m going to teach you three types of questions that will allow you to get the truth out of anyone in any situation. These are techniques that interrogators and interviewers use at the highest level of interrogation, and they work wonders; I’m going to teach you how to adapt it to your day-to-day life so that nobody can hide things from you, and you’ll have a much better chance of extracting the truth out of anyone in any interaction. The first type of question is called the punishment question, and it’s based on the simple fact that psychologically, we have a hard time distancing ourselves from actions or activities that involve us directly.
Now, this is a technique that interrogators use, but you can use this for any context where something was done, and you need to figure out who it was and no one’s speaking up. So, as a parent, I’ve been told this is extremely useful. I’ve taught this to teachers who have said it’s really useful, but if you’re the CEO of a company or a manager, this will really, really help you narrow down your search. The question is the same always. When we figure out who did this, what do you think the consequence should be? Consequence, punishment, whatever you’re more comfortable with. So, first of all, look at the way this is formulated. It’s not if we find out; it’s when we find out.
Still on Three powerful questions to detect lies
So it puts in the person said that we are going to find out who this is. What should the consequence be? After we ask the punishment question, we’re listening carefully for two things. One is the severity of the punishment that they recommend. And two is the pronouns that they use. So, let’s start with the first one. Someone who did not commit this crime is going to be very harsh. They don’t care what the punishment is. It’s not going to happen to them. So let’s say someone stole from work, and you ask the person what the punishment should be. They’re going to recommend things like getting fired, uh, criminal, uh, prosecution, uh, but let’s say, you know, something less severe, like at home or school, they might recommend being grounded for a week.
They might recommend heavy punishments that they would not enjoy at all because, in their head, it’s not going to happen to them. On the other hand, someone who’s guilty of whatever the activity is is likely to have punishments that are much lighter because, in their head, you’ve just said when we find out, so in their head, there’s a scenario where they’re going to get caught. So they’re going to recommend things that really aren’t that severe in most cases when the punishment is really, really intuitively not severe at all, either the person did it themselves, or they’re protecting someone who did. So either way, they have information. The second thing we’re listening for is pronouns. Now, this won’t always happen, but when it does, it’s a really, really good clue.
Still on Three powerful questions to detect lies
Again, it’s because their mind is either connected to the activity or it’s not. So when you get that severe punishment from someone who didn’t do it, you’re often going to hear third person pronouns, something like, oh, they should be fired. Oh, he should be grounded for a week. Things like that. Someone guilty, on the other hand, may not be able to psychologically disconnect from the activity, and you might hear something like, listen, people make mistakes. I wouldn’t want to go to jail for this or listen; everyone makes mistakes. I know I wouldn’t want to be grounded for a week. So when you hear that, I like they’re applying the punishment to them. That’s a really, really good clue that they might be the guilty party.
Okay, now we’re going to jump to the second type of question, which is highly effective at getting the truth out. Out of almost any situation. And it’s used by interrogators all the time and it gets you to the truth really quick. But before we do that, guys, do me a huge favor, hit that subscribe button, and turn those notifications on for more amazing psychology content. The second type of question is something that I’ve heard taught in many different ways under many different titles. Still, the title that I’m going to use for it is something I read about in an amazing book called ‘Spy the Lie,’ which is all about getting to the truth. And I’ll leave a link in the description to this. But it’s called a presumptive question.
Still on Three powerful questions to detect lies
Now, presumptive questions are really powerful because they get the person to psychologically break down and reevaluate their entire story. The presumptive question is always different because it depends on the situation, but it always starts with the same words. And those words are, ‘Is there any reason?’ Let’s look at a real-world example of how this works. So, let’s assume you work in an office, and one day, you notice that your laptop was stolen from your office. And you’re going to question a few people who work in the office to figure out who did this. So, at some point in this questioning, you would ask someone, ‘Is there any reason someone might say they saw you in my office?’ Think about what happens. First of all, you’re not accusing.
Still on Three powerful questions to detect lies
It’s not, ‘Were you in my office?’ or such and such said you were in my office? Why were you in my office? It’s not an accusation. It’s, ‘Is there any reason somebody would have said that?’ Think about what happens in this person’s head. Let’s say the person did it. They think they have an ironclad story. They were going to say they weren’t around. But now you’re saying, ‘Is there any reason someone saw you in my office’? Their entire narrative crumbles because they go, wait, is there, is there a way someone saw me? Is it? So now one of two things is going to happen with the guilty person: either they’re going to get really nervous, and you’re going to start seeing some signs of deception, which are covered in a lot of videos on this channel, or they’re going to make up an excuse as to why they were there.
Oh no, no. I wasn’t there, but I was looking for you. Blah, blah, blah, whatever. And now you’ve placed them at the scene of the crime. So you’re much closer to getting an answer. So again, the presumptive question always starts with, is there any reason blah, blah, blah, and that blah, blah, blah is vague. Never be like, is there any reason that Mark saw you in the office? Because he might know that Mark wouldn’t have seen him. So, keep it as vague as possible. Let’s look at some other examples. Let’s suppose you’re a parent and you left town for the weekend and you think that your kids threw some party. Ask, is there any reason? I’m asking, is there any reason the neighbors would say that they saw a bunch of cars here Saturday night?
Still on Three powerful questions to detect lies
That’s it. That’s all it takes. Because think about what that would do; their entire narrative of, oh, we just took it easy, or we went to the movies would crumble. Now they have to be like, oh yeah, I know some of our friends left their cars, and we took one car to the movies, or whatever the case is; you’re going to start to see deception and get a lot closer to the truth.
Another example that a lot of my clients have used successfully at the beginning of a relationship is a very simple, innocent. Is there any reason someone would tell me that you’re seeing someone else? To sort of check if someone is seeing someone else. It’s so great because it’s not an accusation, it’s just, is there a reason somebody would say that?
Still on Three powerful questions to detect lies
And if they are, I mean, look, if they’re not, the answer is no; there’s no reason anybody would say that. If they are, though, they’re going to start getting nervous, and they’re going to say, ‘Yeah, I don’t know, they must’ve seen me with all this stuff.’ By the way, with the presumptive questions, some of you might be wondering what happens if they get on the defensive or the attack. Like you say, for example. Is there any reason someone would tell me you’re seeing someone else and they go, ‘No, why would you ask me that? How dare you accuse me?’ Well, first of all, getting overly defensive is a sign of deception. So you want to look out for that. But second, you can easily brush it off by saying something like, Oh, you know what?
I must’ve seen an old Facebook post or something like that. So have a justification in the back of your mind as to why you would ask that in case they go, no, that’s why would you think that? But honestly, it doesn’t happen often because either they don’t think much of it and they’re just going, no, or they get stuck in that cyclone of deception. Okay. The third and final type of question to extract the truth out of someone is actually my variation of a technique called the volatile conundrum. Now the Volatile Conundrum is a really great psychological lie detection technique where you tell a small white lie in order to verify if something else is truthful or deceptive. And in this case, we’re going to apply it. Okay.
Still on Three powerful questions to detect lies
If someone tells you that they were somewhere, you want to make sure that that’s, in fact, where they were. And this is the construction question. You’re going to pretend or make up that there was construction or renovation somewhere and see how they respond. I know it sounds crazy, but bear with me with an example. As a parent, I asked my kids where they were last night, and they told me that they went to their friend Jimmy’s house. But I think that they were not. They were at a party, or they went on a date, or whatever it was. The answer to that is, oh, I heard Jimmy’s parents are renovating the entire kitchen. Is it a disaster in there?
So you make this white lie about renovations in the kitchen. Again, think about what this does in the kid’s head because, in his head, he was there, but he doesn’t know if there were renovations. He didn’t hear anything about that. So now he has two choices. One is to be like, yeah, I know it was a total mess. Okay. I can agree with this: what you just made up, but you made it up, so that’s obviously a lie. There are no renovations. Or does he have to take a complete gamble and go, no, what are you? What are you talking about? There are no renovations, which is very rare because if you say with enough conviction, they’re stuck in this sort of like, are there renovations?
Still on Three powerful questions to detect lies
And again, you’re going to see that sort of deep thought, whereas somebody who was there would say, no, what are you talking about? There are no renovations. They were; they would immediately correct you. Now again, if they correct you. You could say, oh, I must’ve misheard. I think I was thinking of someone else, but in most cases, they’re not; they’re just going to laugh it off and be like, no, you’re wrong about that. They won’t really have their guards up that this is a way that you’re testing their narrative. It just doesn’t set off any signals. So there were, guys, three types of questions that will always help you get the truth out of someone. This is something you can sort of practice in your head by imagining scenarios you find yourself in and trying to see which of these three would work best in that scenario. But of course, as always, let me know in the comments if you have any questions for a specific scenario and we’ll figure it out together. Also let me know in the comments what you thought of this and how you intend on using these questions. Thanks so much for watching, guys. I will see you on the next one.
Also, let me know if you have any questions. I will see you on the next one.
Why Nobody Cares What You Do. The BRUTAL Truth!
Would you like to Earn Money Online with just your mobile device?
If yes then click on the link below:
https://earnbean.ng/
