Why Nobody Cares What You Do. The BRUTAL Truth!
Why Nobody Cares What You Do: Are you one of those people who care what people think? Do you think that people are watching you no matter what you do? Well, I’ve got a harsh truth for you. Nobody cares. When I was younger, a small boy, I always remembered my mother saying to me, Nicholas, stop doing that. Everybody’s watching you. Could you not do it? I was set up for an adult life where I started thinking that that was actually true and it turned out not to be the case. And yeah, by the way, my mother called me Nicholas when she wasn’t happy with me and Nick when she was. Once you get past a certain age, and 60 seems like as good an age as any, you shouldn’t really care less what people think anyway.
Because if you do, then you’ve shifted the power to them. You’re actually living your life on a set of rules that are other people’s rules. So you’re not living life on your terms. You’re not doing what you want to do when you want to do it with whoever you want to do it with. You’re taking into account probably strangers’ view of you. And here’s the truth. Those strangers are not taking the blindest bit of notice of you, really. If you want to make the most of your final years of life, and by final years, I mean the last 20 or 30 years, then you really need to stop worrying about what people think of you. As I’ve said earlier, that’s putting people’s opinions ahead of your own.
That’s putting what people think about you and the like on their terms. And living life in your final years shouldn’t be on other people’s terms. It should be on your terms. When you get past 60, you want to be enjoying yourself. You want to enjoy your life. You don’t want to have hang-ups because of what you think people might think about you. In this video, I’ll explain to you why I think that’s in your head. And you’re probably suffering from something called the spotlight effect. It’s really easy. As I said earlier, we can get conditioned from childhood to start taking into account what people think of us. To account that people might be watching us, when really they’re not. At its worst, suffering from the spotlight effect is going to stop you from taking action.
Still on why Why Nobody Cares What You Do:
That thing that’s in your head is going to get in the way of you enjoying your life. In this video, I can show you some ways that you can get that thing out of your head, and you can start living life on your terms. I used to suffer from the spotlight effect. It was definitely something that was on my mind. And I was always concerned about what people would think. And it was just madness to be thinking like that. But my mother was definitely hung up about it. She was the kind of person who seemed to think that people were watching us all the time when really they weren’t. But as soon as I got it out of my head, that nobody cared.
And I won’t lie; it took a long time for me to figure this one out. I don’t know why it took me so long. I was well into my 50s before I started to think along the lines of, ‘I don’t really care what people think.’ And if they are watching, I don’t care. Suppose they are watching me, tough. I’m just going to do what I want to do. The spotlight effect is a close cousin of wanting validation from external things, from people and seeking approval. And I’m no psychologist, but that probably goes back to childhood. So, anything we can do to stop seeking external validation for the things we do has got to be a good thing to release us to live life on our terms.
Once the weight of worrying about what people were thinking was lifted from me, life got a lot more interesting and a lot more pleasurable. I don’t know why I waited so long to lift that weight, but I did. But now it’s gone. I live life on my terms. I want to do what I want to do. And I am. I don’t really care what people think. Even this YouTube channel. It’s good to hear from people who support my view. That’s fantastic. But I get plenty of naysayers, and I’m not really bothered by what they have to say. I’ve got my views. I’m going to stick to them. And this YouTube channel is one way of conveying them.
Still on why Why Nobody Cares What You Do:
The biggest thing you can understand to get over this cognitive bias, the spotlight effect of thinking that everybody’s watching you, is to understand the simple concept that they’re not. They’re more interested in themselves. They’re not interested in you and what you’re doing. They’re more interested in you and what you’re doing. They’re in their world, their universe, and they’re more bothered about themselves. What you do, what you say, what you’re getting up to, particularly strangers in public places, they’re not bothered. They’re only in their zone. Grasp that simple concept, and it will be a life changer. It will free up your mind so you can concentrate on you. How often do you take notice of what people are really doing? Come on, be honest about it.
You probably only give them a passing glance, even if they’re behaving weirdly or if they’ve decided to dye their hair pink. A passing glance, and then you move on. You don’t even think about them. For sure, 10 or 15 minutes after you’ve encountered them, you’re not even thinking about them. And that’s the same with them about you. So why care what they think? Why care what strangers think about your behavior? About how you dress? It just doesn’t make sense. Do your thing, and don’t worry about them. I get plenty of people commenting on these videos about my choice of clothing, for example. I wear Stone Island, Barber, or Hugo Boss, and there’s always somebody popping up to offer their opinion about why I’m wrong to wear those kinds of clothes.
Still on why Why Nobody Cares What You Do:
And you know what? I really couldn’t care less. Most of the time, I’ll delete the comment, because I’ve got the power over this channel. If I want to delete somebody’s comment, I can. And I don’t really care what you think about my dress sense. I’m happy with it. I’m 60-odd years of age. 64, to be precise. Why should I care whether or not you don’t like me wearing Stone Island, or you’ve got an opinion about it? It’s my choice. You wear your clothes, I’ll wear mine. People have got their problems. They’re not concerned about you. They’ve got enough going on in their lives to be concerned about without being concerned about you. And even if they do give you a second thought, or, God forbid, your friends, or your fake friends, to be more precise, are gossiping about you, it’s probably only a 24-hour rule anyway.
They might be talking about you today, but the chances are they’re not going to be talking about you tomorrow. So, instead of worrying about what other people think, start focusing on yourself. Start focusing on what you want to do and the things you want to do to enjoy your life. And don’t let other people get in the way of that thinking. It’s your life. It’s to be enjoyed. There’s no point being hung up about what people think. You’ve just got to get out there, do your thing, and if people don’t like it, tough. The irony is that when you stop caring what people think, more people are actually drawn to you. You actually will gain confidence. It’s a liberating thing to be living a life on your own, set of rules, not on other people’s.
So stop trying to impress people. Stop being concerned about what people think about you. Stop worrying about whether or not you’ve got the right haircut, you’re wearing the right clothing brand. It’s up to you. Who cares if it’s inappropriate? Wear the trainers that you want to wear. Wear the jeans that you want to wear. If you want to run around in rock T-shirts, like the ones I wear with the Jam on them and The Clash, and you’re 60-odd years of age, good for you. Who cares whether people don’t like that? It’s your life. You’ve got to wear what you like, and you’ve got to do the things that you enjoy that make you happy. Who cares whether or not it’s right for them? It’s all about you.
It’s about what you want to do and do the things that make you happy. Don’t do the things that make other people happy. So, thank you very much for watching this video. I hope you found it useful. I’m just on my way to Waitrose to pick up some bits and bobs to cook my wife a lovely risotto this evening. It’s my turn, and I’m well over my gallbladder operation now and raring to go. So yeah, thanks again for watching. You should watch this video next. It’s been a popular one. It’s on the same theme. It’s the five things that I don’t do now that I’ve turned 60. Thanks again for watching. See you next time.
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